Wish For Allie


From the comforts of elementary to MIDDLE SCHOOL! 
I toured Middle school for the first time during their lunch hour. OMG I was horrified. I looked at the special needs teachers across the table and cried. Both teachers said I know its so hard the first time seeing this. This is the reality what she is growing up to be. A tall teenager! I immediately saw the clicks of the all the girls. The jocks, the popular teens with the hair and make up, the odd balls, the dirties ects. Yes all the stereo types where in that lunch room.
Grade 7 and 8th she is doing great. She is never ever without an adult helper or staff or teacher. She has everyone giving her high fives. She fits in because I make damn sure she has the right cloths and hair. God that acne is out of control. Gotta get a hold of that shit!
She is doing great. My fears are gone.

8th grade Mesa Middle School Castle Rock, CO
Rockin that hot pink hair

4th Grade North Education Center, New Hope, MN 
Allie has been doing well, except October. It's March 2014 and we had a bad week in February too. Allie had a substitute teacher and one less para. So the staff was not getting cues of her escalation. Allie was running out of the building. The staff tried to calm her b it she was in the red. The staff member, Kate Scneider called the on site police and Allie was placed in their possession. After she climbed on the desk of the police officer and kicked him, she was placed in handcuffs. We are devastated that the school failed her. They did recognize this failure and got multiple apologies after our meeting.
However, I would not Allie in any other school.

3rd Grade North Education Center, New Hope, MN, started 9-4-12
Kate is a social worker at North Education Center. She is a breath of fresh air. She told me we will get Allie to like school. This is our job. The team for Allie is good. I feel we have a good start so far.

The school NEC, uses the Nurtured Heart Approach by Howard Glasser. We are learning about it for home use.

1st and 2nd Grade at Weaver Lake Elementary School, Maple Grove MN, 2009-2011

School Meeting Story at Weaver Lake Elem. grade 2:
It was December 13, 2011. Age 8 and in 2nd grade. A dreaded IEP meeting was scheduled. OMG! I have to go ALONE to this one?
Simple! I can go to this IEP meeting without my spouse!! He always goes to every school meeting or event. He has to go to work and has a big meeting today.
I can do this. This is my job.


The smiling staff and I gather in a warm, small conference room with an oval table.
I should have taken off my jacket.
  • The panel was made up of an Autism specialist, the Special Ed director, Special Ed teacher, OT lady with her OT dog Jack, Phy Ed DAPE staff, school Principal, school Psychologist, and her 2nd grade teacher. All very pleasant professional women that care about Allie.
  • 2 and a half hours later!! I left that school got in my car and drove away. What the fuck just happened?
  • I was paralyzed, maybe in a state of shock from the 8 school officials plus Jack the dog, going through a 28 page evaluation and reporting to me all the depressing stuff about my only child. 
  1. She has not improved since first grade in reading or writing. 
  2. She has lost some of her phy ed skills from last year.
  3. She does her math, but not at 2nd grade level.
  4. Her IQ score has dropped since the last time she was evaluated.
  5. She does not comply with teachers or help staff like she did in first grade.
  6. Should her primary diagnosis be Autism or Other Health Issues? They spent a lot of time and discussion on that one. 
  • Basic reading skills 14th percentile.
  • Reading Comprehension 11th percentile.
  • Math Calculation 18th percentile.
  • Math Reasoning 21st percentile.
  • Written Expression 6th percentile.

This was actually her re-evaluation meeting. Allie just had 30 days of testing. 
I knew about the re-evaluating, but I thought it would be more positive remarks coming home in her backpack.

This meeting was different. 
  • Then I pulled over into a public parking lot. Hot, sweaty, emotionally drained. I called my husband and cried. I don't even remember what I told him. Honestly. 
  • I cried my eyes out for the next four hours. Alone, in my bed with the curtains shut tight.
  • How could she grow and learn so much in first grade and reverse her skills in second grade?
It took me about 2 weeks to not to think about that dreadful meeting.

This school staff is very patient with us. 
But we may have to tour another facility soon.

This year 2011:
Called 3 times to pick Allie up because the bus turned around due to Allie not sitting buckled in the seat.

Called 2 times to pick Allie up from school because she is hurting herself and others.

Approximately once a week since school started, the special ed teacher talks to me about Allie's behavior.
"Are there med changes? She is really hyper today".
"Anything we should know about the weekend?"
"What is a reward system that works?"